Gentlemen, you might know your age—but do you know your penis’ age?
Enter Bryan Johnson, the 47-year-old tech mogul and anti-aging enthusiast who claims his latest biohacking stunt has turned back the clock on his manhood. According to Johnson, his penile health now rivals that of a 22-year-old, all thanks to his ultra-disciplined lifestyle and a gadget that tracks nighttime erections.
Yes, you read that right. Johnson monitors his erections while he sleeps, measuring how long and how often his penis engorges with blood—because apparently, nothing says peak health like keeping score of your nocturnal wood. He even compared his data to his 19-year-old son’s, discovering that their nightly “performance” was shockingly similar (which is definitely not weird at all).
Does Any of This Make Sense?
Urologists say nighttime erections are a sign of cardiovascular health, but not the ultimate indicator of youth. Erectile dysfunction can signal heart disease years before a heart attack, but obsessing over “penis age” might lead to performance anxiety rather than longevity.
And that 22-year-old penis claim? Doctors aren’t buying it. The only thing that keeps a penis youthful, they say, is a healthy lifestyle—and keeping it out of trouble.
So, should you start tracking your AndroAge? Probably not. Just focus on keeping your whole body in good shape – and maybe let your penis age in peace.
